Discussing Death With Children - Memorial Funeral Home

Memorial Funeral Home • March 13, 2022

Discussing the topic of death or a funeral to a child is never an easy conversation to have. If you find you are struggling with this, read on for some of our suggestions when broaching the subject.

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Death is an uncomfortable and scary conversation for anyone, but when it comes time to broach the subject with a child, parents can feel downright terrified. On one hand, you don’t wish to frighten the child and on the other, you also don’t wish to be dishonest. So, what is the happy medium? Fortunately, it’s a lot simpler than you may have thought, bite the bullet and tell them the truth! Our funeral homes in McAllen, TX are always open and willing to help in any way that we can! While it may seem like a bad thing to discuss death with someone so young, we promise in the long run it will only serve to benefit your child and teach them about the reality of things.

Be Honest 

One of the first and most important things you’ll want to keep in mind when beginning to have this conversation with your child is to be as transparent and honest as possible. While this does not mean going into the specifics of the particular death, this does mean that you veer away from terminology such as “fell asleep” as this can lead to confusion and further miscommunication. It is essential that your child has a full grasp of everything that you are telling them. Children are much more observant than we give them credit for, so if you do lie, chances are they will sense something is off. To avoid this, we suggest simply being upfront and honest as we don’t want them to hear the actual truth about death from another source and have them realize you were being deceptive.

Make Sure They Understand 

Again, when discussing matters such as death, it is absolutely vital that you ensure that your child fully understands what this means. You don’t, for example, want your child thinking that the deceased will eventually wake up one day and rejoin life again. To avoid this, be open and honest and be sure to answer any and all questions they may have. Avoid sugarcoating things as this is rarely ever helpful in the long run. Simply think of it this way, your child will eventually discover the truth about death anyway, so wouldn’t you prefer them to learn it from you than out in the world from someone else?

Prepare for their Reaction 

When broaching this subject, it’s important that you are prepared for a reaction on your child’s part. Now, this can look a number of different ways including anger, confusion, fear, and sorrow. All of these reactions are normal, so don’t be alarmed when this occurs. Truthfully, these reactions are a positive sign as this demonstrates that your child possesses empathy for others and is unafraid to express their emotions.

Cry Together 

One of the best things you can do during this conversation is express your emotions alongside your child. While it may be your instinct to remain strong in their presence, this is not the right approach. Instead, revealing  your emotions with your child shows them that vulnerability and expressing their emotions, rather than bottling them up, is a healthy way to cope.
Our funeral homes in McAllen, TX are excited to serve you and your family! Contact us today.

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