Debunking Myths About Grief
April 25, 2022
There are a lot of misconceptions and myths surrounding the experience of grief. We've decided to clear up some of these myths involving grief after a funeral so you can know what to expect!
For those who are new to grief, it’s important to understand what is and is not normal. Unfortunately, a lot of myths and misconceptions have been spread when it comes to grief. These myths are harmful in that it gives people who are new to grief false ideas about what they are experiencing and can even put them in an even more negative headspace. To combat this, we’ve decided to debunk some popular myths. If you need
cremation services in Alamo, TX
we want to let you know that we are only a phone call away! We are always happy to assist in any way that we can.
One of the most common misconceptions associated with grief is the idea that it is linear for all. This is simply not true! While some individuals may in fact experience a linear form of grief with ordered stages such as denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, and guilt, others may not. Some individuals don’t even encounter certain stages altogether. Clarifying the fact that it is normal to not experience every stage is important because it helps people feel as though they are not abnormal for not doing so. It’s important to remember that everyone grieves in their own unique way, and what may not be normal for some can be for others.
Another myth that a lot of people hold to be true is the idea that maintaining an attachment to a family member who has passed means you are not moving on properly. Again, this is simply not true. In fact, regularly making attempts to remember the deceased with songs, rituals, mementos, and activities is a healthy way for people to confront their grief, begin and maintain their process of healing, and internalize the loss in their own way! In fact, it would actually be strange if someone decided to forget about the deceased altogether as that would signify a denial of their death. Expressing one’s emotions is never a bad thing!
Another myth that people love to spout is that time will heal all wounds. While it may make someone who is newly experiencing grief feel hopeful, it is simply not true. Time does not heal your grief but allows you to grow and come to terms with it eventually. So, while ten years may have passed since someone’s death, that doesn’t necessarily mean that their loved ones will have no grief left but instead, the time has allowed them the space they need to learn how to cope with it in their own way.
Grief and mourning are not the same at all! Grief is the process of us internalizing our emotions as a result of a tragic loss in our lives, while mourning is a public expression of those emotions. So, while mourning can last from the beginning of the loss to around the time the deceased is buried, grief can last months and even years afterward.
Grief is Linear
One of the most common misconceptions associated with grief is the idea that it is linear for all. This is simply not true! While some individuals may in fact experience a linear form of grief with ordered stages such as denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, and guilt, others may not. Some individuals don’t even encounter certain stages altogether. Clarifying the fact that it is normal to not experience every stage is important because it helps people feel as though they are not abnormal for not doing so. It’s important to remember that everyone grieves in their own unique way, and what may not be normal for some can be for others.
Attachment is an Issue
Another myth that a lot of people hold to be true is the idea that maintaining an attachment to a family member who has passed means you are not moving on properly. Again, this is simply not true. In fact, regularly making attempts to remember the deceased with songs, rituals, mementos, and activities is a healthy way for people to confront their grief, begin and maintain their process of healing, and internalize the loss in their own way! In fact, it would actually be strange if someone decided to forget about the deceased altogether as that would signify a denial of their death. Expressing one’s emotions is never a bad thing!
Time Heals All
Another myth that people love to spout is that time will heal all wounds. While it may make someone who is newly experiencing grief feel hopeful, it is simply not true. Time does not heal your grief but allows you to grow and come to terms with it eventually. So, while ten years may have passed since someone’s death, that doesn’t necessarily mean that their loved ones will have no grief left but instead, the time has allowed them the space they need to learn how to cope with it in their own way.
Grief and Mourning are the Same
Grief and mourning are not the same at all! Grief is the process of us internalizing our emotions as a result of a tragic loss in our lives, while mourning is a public expression of those emotions. So, while mourning can last from the beginning of the loss to around the time the deceased is buried, grief can last months and even years afterward.
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